Wednesday, January 26, 2011

Flirting with disaster

I am praying for a friend who made some bad choices in the last few months. It's caused him to lose his job and possibly ended his career. It would be completely understood if his wife left but she believes in "for better or worse" and thinks their child deserves for them to try and work it out. He's been humbled and brought to the feet of Jesus. If they can look past the day-to-day, I know they'll see that by working it through, their relationship with each other and with the Lord will be stronger than before. Still, it's hard to watch them when all I can do is offer encouragement and pray for them.

It has made me examine how blessed I am that none of the horrific choices I've made in my life (and there are some whoppers) have had any long-term, life-altering consequences. That is by the grace of God, for sure.

Now if I could only focus on letting God lead BEFORE I have to do something so drastic that I reach the end of my rope. I pray that in the midst of my friend's prayers, I find some meaning.

Saturday, January 08, 2011

What a difference a day makes

On Thursday, I met with my friend whose marriage was having trouble. She told me that things were getting better little by little. She knew that the road ahead was going to be tough but was willing to do the hard work to make things happen.

On Friday, she called me in tears to say she caught her husband with his pants down. Literally. The whole time they've been working through things, he's been lying to her and continuing down his path to family destruction.

I am so disappointed but can't say for certain that I am shocked. I'm living my worst nightmare over again. But at least this time it can be used to help someone through their worst time. I can't believe I'm saying this, but thanks be to God for connecting me with her when she needs it most. Now at least I feel like my experience has meaning and purpose.

Saturday, January 01, 2011

New wine, old skins

One problem with every New Year is the mindset that it's a clean slate and to make changes in your life, you simply have to move forward. That's really a lie. The only time you have a clean slate is the day you are born. After that, you have history. So in order to make positive changes in your life, you have to first undo all of the negative, which is actually harder.

Maintenance is infinitely easier, less costly and better than repair but how often do we let things go until they finally give way, forcing us to pay attention to the situation. It's an easy illustration with cars and homes, but the same logic applies to our health, our finances and our relationships.

Sometimes life feels like you are pushing a dead car up a hill in the snow. When faced with the newness of the year (be it calendar, fiscal or school), one is eager for a change and is filled with a severe case of the "shoulds;"
- I should eat better
- I should exercise more
- I should spend more time in the Word
- I should get a handle on my addictions
- I should control my finances
- I should take better care of my possessions
- I should pay more attention to my relationships
What it really boils down to is that we end up "should-ing" all over ourselves and being covered in "should" feels dirty and defeating.

My resolution is to just take it one day at a time. One task at a time. One thought at a time. It's the year to slow down and get more done.